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The more desperate you are to get what you want, whether it be sex or a relationship, the more likely it will slip through your fingers.The metaphorical scent of desperation is the antithesis of attraction; much like negativity, it suffuses about you, from the way you speak to the way you act. It screams of low self-esteem and equally low regard for the person on the receiving end of their attentions. Nerd Love, even in myself in different aspects of my daily life. You’re not getting any responses from your online dating profile. Over the years I’ve seen these issues crop up again and again; I’ve seen them in friends, in the letters I’ve gotten as Dr.Suddenly, you couldn’t swing a dead cat in a bar without hitting someone trying to rock a fuzzy top-hat and black nail polish or a shiny silk jacket, spiky earrings and New Rock boots.The problem of course is that while Mystery was able to get away with dressing like a Hot Topic jumped him in a dark alley, he’s a professional magician; dressing weird comes with the territory.There’s a reason why “just be yourself” is one of the most annoyingly useless advice cliches out there.After all, it’s likely that “being yourself” hasn’t exactly gotten you to where you want to be. When we look at people who have something we want – whether it be material success, a skill or talent or even just a hot girlfriend – it’s only natural to try to be more like them.
Nowhere was this more apparent than in the early days of the Pick Up community, when people assumed that one of the secrets of success with meeting women is to “peacock”; that is, dress up in exotic or even outlandish ways in order to get attention.Nobody likes feeling like an interchangeable, anonymous cog, easily replaceable and ultimately unmemorable.On a practical level, desperation hurts you in a multitude of ways.Whatever they’ve got going for them worked for them… And after all, whatever you’ve been doing hasn’t exactly been working out for you so far.The problem with this approach is that, frankly, that’s not .